Dollhouse
by Kyarra Iyono
Summary: The Uchiha family was perfect. Everyone says so. The kids got good grades and the parents made good money. They were always happy and smiling, they never said anything bad about anyone. They were just so perfect. Except for when the curtains were closed and the doors were locked. That's when they don't have to pretend to be dolls anymore.
1. Dollhouse

**A/N**

**Okay, so this fic is based loosely on the song Dollhouse by Melanie Martinez. You know, that chick that was on The Voice. I do **_**not **_**own the song, or Naruto characters. And, like I said, it is loosely based. I won't be typing out all the lyrics or anything.**

**Oh yeah, and Kyarra is in the story. If you don't know who she is, look at my profile. Or don't if you don't really care. Thanks!**

* * *

Dollhouse

The Uchiha family was perfect. Everyone says so.

The mother, Sakura, looked young and beautiful, with diamond jewelry and expensive clothes. The father, Sasuke, was very rich, young, and every girl wanted him. The son, Naruto, was a well-groomed sixteen-year-old that went to a fancy private school. And the daughter, Kyarra, was a quiet, averagely pretty thirteen-year-old girl who enjoyed drawing.

They had the perfect family. The kids got good grades and the parents made good money.

Perfect.

Except for when the curtains were closed and the doors were locked.

Right now, I, Kyarra, am sitting cross-legged on my living room floor while my mother, Sakura, is laying on the couch, a flask in her hand. I am drawing a picture of a doll who looks like me. Mom takes a long swig, coughs, then groans. Earlier, dad went out to "get a few things", as he does oh-so-often. He disappears for the night and comes home some time very early in the morning. And he leaves his wedding ring here every time.

"Mom?"

"Huhn?" Mom turns to me.

"You should check on Naruto." I tell her seriously. I don't talk much, so she should know she should listen when I do. But when she's in this state, she doesn't know much other than how much alcohol she needs to forget about what dad's really doing.

"He's fine." her words are starting to slur slightly.

"No he's not, mum."

"What's wrong with him then?" she asks, sounding exasperated.

"Just go check on him!" I cry, "Go and you'll see!"

"Don't you raise your voice at me young lady!"

"Mom!"

"Your brother is fine, I don't need to go anywhere! Now leave me to my..." she trailed off, looking at her flask.

"Leave you to what, mum?" I ask, biting back tears, "Leave you to your alcohol? Leave you to drink until you forget that dad is out there with some _slut_?"

"I have heard enough out of you!" She screams at me, raising a hand. Just as she's about to swing and hit me in the face, the doorbell rings. She freezes. Naruto opens his door a crack, and the smell of cannabis drifts down the stairs. Very subtle, but there.

How has neither mom nor dad noticed? Or maybe they just didn't care. They have enough problems on their own.

Mom stands and smooths down her dress, looks in the mirror over the stairs and fixes her hair. I watch as she walks over to the door and opens it, smiling brightly.

"No, no, everything's fine here!" I hear mother say. Plastic. She's gone back to being plastic, fake, a doll. "You heard raised voices? No, it was just the t.v., you see. Kyarra was watching some dance show and the girls on it were fighting over some guy." she sighs, "Oh to be young and be able to fight over such petty things again."

The person says something, and mother laughs, "Oh, stop it! Of course we'll be at your and Hinata's party tomorrow!"

The person peeks their head around the corner of the door and grins at me. It's Kiba Inuzuka, dad's friend. "Hey, Kyarra. What's up?"

"Oh," I give him a big, plastic smile, "Nothing, just watching a dance show."

"Where's your dad?"

"He's out right now." I tell him half of the truth. '_Sleeping with some random girl.'_ I want to add, but I hold my tongue.

Kiba and mom talk for a little while longer, then Kiba leaves. Mom comes back to the couch and downs half of her flask. I stand, holding my sketchpad and pencil, and say goodbye to mom. She seems to have forgotten our little fight already. I walk away from my broken mother and pretend everything is okay.

I walk past a family picture on my way up the stairs. I remember the day we took that picture.

"_Get closer to your brother, Kyarra!" Mom said, pushing me toward him. But I didn't want to go closer to him. He smelled of weed._

_The photographer snapped a picture of my parents standing behind us with their hands on our shoulders._

"_Uh, sweetie, you have to smile." the man told me._

"_Okay." I had forgotten to smile. Then I remembered we were supposed to be dolls so I put on my best plastic smile and he snapped another picture._

"_Perfect." he said, but still took a few more. We picked the ones we thought were best, paid him, and left._

I continue up the stairs, past Naruto's room. I can smell the weed through the closed door. I pass mom and dad's empty room. Mom is probably passed out on the couch, and dad in some motel room.

I reach the attic. I walk up the final three steps, then race across the floor until I reach a little house that looks like mine. Inside, there are four little dolls, a mom, a dad, a brother, and a sister. The sister looks like me.

You may think I'm a little old to be playing with dolls. Well, think what you want, but I don't care. I like my dolls. They're better company than the people I live with.

I show my picture to the sister doll. She doesn't move. The mom doll is washing dishes, just as I left her. The dad is sitting at the table, reading a newspaper. The brother sits on a chair in his room, smiling. The sister doll stands in the middle of the living room. I don't remember leaving her there.

This is my perfect family.

But...

I wonder what happens behind this house's closed curtains, locked doors.

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**Ending note!**

**Okay so I loved writing this! It was just a little something to help cure my writers block, but I hope you like it!**  
**Remember to favorite and review!**

**Also, give me some idea's for new stories and I'll get writin'!**


	2. Put on Your Doll Faces

**A/N**

**Okay, so this chapter will be a little more about Kyarra, and introducing which Naruto characters are playing which roles. **

**Enjoy!**

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Put on Your Doll Faces.

My father is back at 2:11 in the morning. I know because I am still awake. I know that now he is taking off his shoes and walking upstairs. He is walking into my brothers room. He smells the cannabis, as it is probably very strong in there, but ignores it. He walks out and closes the door behind him, then he walks to my room. He opens the door, and I close my eyes and pretend to be asleep.

It's the same routine every time.

Only this time something different happens.

"I'm sorry, Sakura." I hear dad whisper before he walks to his bedroom and opens the door. He closes it behind him, and I hear the bedsprings groan.

He thinks everyone is asleep so no one can hear him crying.

But I can.

A few hours later, I'm getting ready for school. I put on my mascara and pink lipgloss, brush and curl my hair, then tie a pink ribbon around my head so it matches my dress. I go downstairs to see mother still asleep on the couch. It is 7:50, and Naruto has already left for school. I am still in grade eight. Next year, I'll be going to the same school as him. I'm not looking forward to it.

Dad walks downstairs. I see his eyes are red and very puffy from crying for so long, but I pretend not to notice. He cried until I fell asleep, maybe later, so it figures his eyes would look like that today.

He kisses me on the forehead and asks me what I want to eat for breakfast. I lie and say I already ate. He nods and wipes at his eyes vigorously.

"Cucumber." I say.

"What?"

"Cucumber will make your eyes less puffy. I don't know about the redness though."

"Oh... Thanks, sweetie." He opens the fridge and takes out the cucumber. I grab a granola bar and my backpack and head for the door. I'm an hour early, but who cares? It's better than being around my hungover mom when she wakes up.

"Bye, daddy. See you later!"

"Wait," he calls after me, "Doesn't school start at 9:15?"

I'm surprised he remembered "Tenten and Lee are driving me and Neji in. I told them I would meet them at the stop sign."

"Okay, well, be careful."

I open the door and step out into the hot June air. I walk to the end of my driveway and turn right. There I see a stop sign at the end of the road with a familiar red car parked next to it. I put on my plastic smile and run to it, opening the door closest to me and jumping in.

Tenten and Lee say hi and ask me how I've been, how's life with the Uchiha's?

Falling apart.

"We're good!" I chirp, then turn to Neji sitting next to me. I hug him tight.

"Hi, Ky." He says into my shoulder.

"Hi Neji."

"So yesterday I..." He jumps into a story about his lacrosse game and how well he played. I don't really care for lacrosse, I'm more of a soccer girl. But I listen anyways, chewing on my granola bar while he talks.

Once his story is done, I ask, "Are you guys going to the Inuzuka's party tonight?"

"Yes we are, Kyarra!" Lee cries. He's always very enthusiastic.

"Calm down, Lee, you're going to scare her!"

I'm slightly offended. I'm not six after all. But I laugh, "It's alright, I'm used to it by now."

We arrive at school.

* * *

Grade eight is hell. It's as easy as that. The classes are hard, and the social system is harder. There are the populars. There are the jocks–who are also rather popular. There are the nerds.

Then there's me, Neji, and Gaara.

We don't get picked on. But we do get ignored. I'm too quiet, I don't talk to people, so I don't make friends. Gaara has this issue with people in general, and is very picky about who enters his personal bubble. Neji has been my friend since we were little, so he hangs around us. He could probably be popular if he ditched us, since he's really cute, but he insisted he needed to stick around and protect us for some reason.

Basically, we're the outcasts. The non-bullied outcasts.

Right now it's lunch. Me, Neji and Gaara sit alone in the corner. The other cliques are spread out across the room. Populars in the center. Jocks in one corner, tossing a baseball around and laughing loudly. Nerds in the corner playing some card game. Neji munches on a sandwich. Gaara eats cookies, which Neji insists can't be good for him to eat every day, to which Gaara replies, "Shut up, or I'll kill you."

I have no food in front of me.

"Aren't you eating, Ky?" Neji asks me.

"I'd give you one of my cookies..." Gaara tells me, "...But they're _my_ cookies."

"No, I'm not hungry." I lie. My stomach growls loudly, giving me away.

"I haven't seen you eat lunch in weeks." Gaara puts his hand against my forehead in a bout of out-of-characterness, "Are you feeling okay?"

"I'm fine." I lie again. Nothing can ever be fine in a world where I have to pretend to be a doll, where I have to pretend to be perfect.

Neji eyes me carefully, still chewing his sandwich. Then he turns to Gaara and starts talking about his lacrosse game again, and the attention is off me. My secret is still safe.

I wonder what my dolls are doing right now.

* * *

**Ending note!**

**Ahaha... you thought Kyarra was sane...**

**Oh well. Love you guys!**

**~Kyarra-Chan (^_~)**


	3. Don't Let Them See

**A/N**

**So, Nuke Tremor answered my question first, so they got to pick Naruto's partner. So I get to make the choice between Choji, Tayuya, and Kin Tsuchi. I guess you'll just have to read and find out who I chose. Thanks for the idea's, Nuke! ^_^**

**Also, as a reply to k, Sasuke was crying because he knows what Sakura has been doing and he knows it's because of him, and he felt guilty. I probably could have explained that better, but since it's Kyarra's POV... yeah. I'll work on that. as for why things are falling apart, Sasuke's sleeping with other women, Sakura's an alcoholic, Naruto's doing weed and Kyarra... well, let's see who can guess what's up with her.**

**Enjoy!**

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Don't Let Them See

I guess today was the day the regular routines change.

After lunch the teacher left the room, saying she'll be back in ten minutes. A tall, pretty girl walked over to where I was sitting alone. Gaara wasn't in this class, and we were doing group work. Neji wasn't in my group. I sat separated from everyone else, doing my work independently.

The girl, Elsie, leaned over me, grinning. "Hey Kyarra. You looked so lonely over here, it looks like your group doesn't want to work with you or something."

"...um..." I looked down. People don't usually talk to me, especially not popular people like Elsie. Suddenly, I felt arms wrap around me, and I looked up to see long, light-brown hair covering my face. She is hugging me. I hug her back awkwardly. When she pulls away, I hear a slight crinkling, but ignore it.

"Sorry." She says, starting to walk away, "You just looked so sad."

"...okay." I say, then get back to work. I hear the popular girls and boys snickering, but I ignore it and stay focussed on our math sheet. I hear my group asking one another what the answers are. I write my last number, walk over and drop the paper in the middle of the group, then walk away. I hear more laughter, but ignore it once again. Probably some inside joke I don't know.

I hear lots of whispers though. The room was very loud before, but now it is quiet. All I can hear is the soft _hush_ of lowered voices. "Fat." I hear mixed among the murmurs, "Bitch. Ugly. Pig. Whale."

I wonder what they're talking about.

Finally, the whispers hit Neji, and he stands up and runs over to me. He reaches toward me back and I hear a sound like tape coming off of fabric.

"Neji?" I ask, noticing everyone staring at me. He reads the paper that is suddenly in his hand. Where did he get it from? He wasn't holding it before.

_Bitch_ it reads in different coloured markers and different handwriting, _Fat, Ugly, Whore, Slut, Whale, Pig, Wannabe, _the words swirl through my brain as I read them. Everyone in the room is silent. It takes me a moment to realize they were laughing at _me._ That paper came off of _my _back.

I look at Elsie. She grins evilly and waves at me. I smile and wave back.

I sit down in my chair, block out the whispers, and begin to draw a puppet controlled by strings.

She has blonde hair with black streaks, and blue eyes. She wears a pink dress with a pink bow in her hair. She is smiling.

It is fake.

* * *

The bus ride home is filled with paper being thrown at the back of my head and catcalls, no matter how much Neji yells at them. After about the eighth time he stands up to tell them off again, I put my hand on his arm.

"It's okay, Neji. I'm fine."

"No it's not okay!" He yells, shaking me off. I pull him back down to the seat.

"Please stop. I don't want you to be targeted too. I'm fine, really."

He looks at me, then crosses his arms, looking out the front window. "You don't have to be strong with me, you know. You can trust me. I know all your secrets, don't I?"

I put my hand on his arm again, "Not even close." I tell him honestly, then turn around to face my attackers. I watch as their catcalls stop. The entire bus goes silent, frozen as I have everyone's complete and utter attention.

"I'm sorry you all feel that way about me."

No one speaks.

I turn back around and spend the rest of the bus ride enjoying the silence.

* * *

"Kyarra!" I hear as soon as I open my front door, "Can you get me some Advil?"

"Yes, mom." I call back, then run to the bathroom and root through the cupboards. Sometimes I wonder what my mom does all day while I'm at school. We seem to have a never-ending supply of Tylenol and Advil, so maybe she goes shopping.

I wonder what the people at the liquor store think when she buys so much every week.

"Why didn't you ask Naru?" I ask while I hand her the little red pills and a cup of water. She downs them, sighs, then answers, "Because he's at the Sabaku's."

The Sabaku's were Gaara's family. His mother was named Temari, and his father was Shikamaru. His older brother was Naruto's age. His name is Kankuro, and I'm pretty sure he's Naruto's hookup.

Naruto's girlfriend is named Kin Tsuchi. They've been dating ever since I can remember, but apparently Kankuro dated her before Naruto did. Or at least, that's what Gaara told me. Kankuro is loud and obnoxious, kinda like Naruto. Gaara is the complete opposite. Sometimes I wonder how they are brother.

Once mom is done asking about school, only half-caring, I run up to the attic. My stomach growls as I sit myself down in front of my dollhouse. All I had to eat today is a granola bar. I wonder what we're having for dinner.

I seem to wonder a lot of things.

I pick up the sister doll and smooth down her hair. She smiles at me, as always. I smile back. The mom doll and the dad doll are holding hands across the dining room table. The brother doll is watching t.v. in the living room.

I decide to name the brother doll Naruto, the mom doll Sakura, The dad doll Sasuke, and the sister doll Kyarra.

Now it can be what my family would be like if we really were as perfect as everyone says.

I wonder what I did to deserve what happened at school.

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**Ending note.**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed, favourited, and followed this story! ^_^ If you're liking it, you can check out my other stories if you want. They might not be as depressing as this one, but some have Kyarra in them.**

**Love youuuuuu!**

**~Kyarra-Chan (^_~)**


	4. Go Back to Being Plastic

**A/N**

**Sooo... I have like, no idea's left for this story. So if you get a fabulous idea (And I know you have many because you are so fab) or even a not fabulous idea, PM me! It will be much appreciated. Otherwise... it'll be time to say goodbye to this fic. Sad, but true, since I have, like, no sense of creativity.**

**Enough of my blabbing, let's get to the story!**

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Go Back to Being Plastic

The Inuzuka's party is much more crowded than I expected. It's actually crazy. There are people _everywhere_, I can barely walk. Luckily, it's outdoors, so I have room to escape into the woods behind the pool if I need to.

Mom sits with her best friend Ino by the pool, sipping a bright pink wine cooler. I know that she wants to down it and find another, but she's controlling her urge around all these people. She is a puppet controlled by her need to be seen as perfect.

Dad is talking to some young, pretty, redish-pink-haired lady named Tayuya. I don't know her last name, and I don't think he does either. But that isn't stopping him from flirting with her. I watch for a few minutes. Not out of curiosity, just trying to see if he's really going to do that with mom so close by. After I watch her put her hand on his leg, I turn away, disgusted.

Naruto is with Kin and Kankuro. Kin sits on his lap, nursing a wine cooler even though she's underage. No one really seems to care. Kankuro is smoking a cigarette, though I know he prefers weed. Sometimes I feel I know too much about my brothers friends. Kankuro shoots a jealous look in Naruto's direction when my brother is not looking. I bet it's because of Kin.

Neji and Gaara are lost somewhere in the crowd I'm sure. Gaara must be freaking out at how many people are in his personal space. Neji could be socializing, he's a lot more talkative than me and Gaara.

I walk up to my mother. "Hi, mum!"

"Hi, Ky, what's up?" She asks, smiling happily.

"Hey, Kyarra." Ino waves, and I hug her.

"Hi, auntie Ino." I call her auntie Ino because mom says she's a part of our family. She's not related by blood though. I don't completely understand, but I just go along with it.

I turn slightly and see Tayuya take dad's hand and pull him inside the house. I feel like throwing up. But instead, I turn to mom.

"Can I try some of your drink?" I ask, and she hands it to me.

"Not too much." She tells me, "You _are_ still underage you know."

"Mm-hm." I say into the bottle, nodding. I sip a little bit. It tastes of fruit and sugar, with a slight alcohol aftertaste. I sip more. My cheeks feel funny, like I'm blushing almost. But I know I haven't had nearly enough to drink for that to happen. I hand the bottle back to my mother.

"It's good. Thanks mom!" I skip away, looking around for Neji or Gaara. I see why mom likes alcohol so much.

I'm pushing past people when someone runs smack into me. I fall to the ground, landing painfully on my hands.

"Sorry!" The person says quickly, then looks at me on the ground. I look back up at them, and it takes me a second to realize who it is.

"It's alright, Elsie. Help me up?" I hold out a hand, trying to make my eyes look wide and innocent. I don't know why I'm still trying to be her friend after what she did to me, but I guess I'm just one of those people who trusts too much.

"Why would I help a skank like you up?" She sneers, turning away. Looks like she noticed it was me she ran into.

"What did I do?" I ask, and she freezes, turning back to me. "Why do you hate me so much?" I continue, and it's probably the most I've said to her in my life, "I'm sorry for whatever I did. I just want us to be friends."

"You were born, that's what you did to piss me off." Elsie hisses through her teeth, "You act like you're so much better than everyone. You act like you're _perfect_. Well you know what, _bitch_?" She grabs my wrist and pulls hard, making me almost stumble into her. Her face is right up to mine now, her hand squeezing my wrist painfully.

"You're not perfect. You're ugly, and fat, and you are _not_ better than me. And until you start acting like it, I'm going to make your life a living hell."

"Elsie, I'm sorry. I won't act like that anymore." I say, holding back tears. My life at home is already hell, now I have to deal with this shit at school too?

"You'd better not." she said, then let go of my wrist and turned away. "Oh yeah," She said, looking back slightly at me, "And I'd _never_ be friends with you." I watched her walk through the crowd until I couldn't see her anymore.

I stood there for a minute, then plastered on my doll face, brushed off my dress, and went off again to go find my friends. I feel like crying, but I won't let anyone see that. I have to stay strong, I have to stay calm. I have to find Neji and Gaara.

I wonder how I'm going to find them in such a huge place.

* * *

**Ending note!**

**HELP ME FIND IDEAS PLEASE I AM LEGIT GRASPING AT STRAWS NOW WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN I'M TIRED AND I WANT FOOOOOOD!**

**LOVE YOU GUYS SOOOO MUCH!**

**~Kyarra-Chan (^_~)**


	5. Everyone Thinks that We're Perfect

**A/N**

**INSPIRATION MODE ACTIVATED!**

**Thank you for everyone who helped with the ideas! You guys rock! Please continue helping! Shoutout to BloodyAyame23 and Nuke Tremor for helping! You guys rock!**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Everyone Thinks that We're Perfect

I find Neji and Gaara over by the snack table and the non-alcoholic punch bowl. I see the chips and dip, the brownies, the cookies which Gaara had already eaten half of, and I want to eat it _all_. I want to shove every single bite into my mouth and let it fall into my empty stomach

But I don't. Empty is strong. That food is poison and if I eat a single bite, I'll swell up like a balloon and float away.

I find myself reaching for the cookies. I am not in control of my body, as always.

Just as I'm about to take a cookie and shove it into my mouth, Gaara slaps my hand away.

"My cookies." He hisses, taking a handful.

I regain control. This is the only thing I have control over in my life. I will not be fat anymore if I keep this up. Elsie can't call me fat anymore.

"She did WHAT?" Neji asks after I told him about what happened with Elsie. His face was red with anger. Gaara stepped forward.

"I heard her talking to Kenzie." He said through a mouthful of cookies, "She said the only perfect one is herself."

"I'm going to go-" Neji started, but I cut him off.

"No, Neji. It's okay. I'm fine." I look around and see that Naruto and Kin are now making out, her still on his lap. Ew. I turn back to Neji.

"You're being bullied, Kyarra! That is not okay!" He stamps his foot like a child. I put my hand on his arm.

"I don't need to deal with anything else right now, okay? So please, just drop it. I only told you because I can't... I can't keep _everything_ on the inside, you know?"

"What do you mean?" Neji tilted his head, staring at me intensely, "What exactly have you not told me, Kyarra? You said on the bus that I don't know almost any of your secrets. I mean, me and Gaara know you still play with dolls. What else is there?"

"I..." Have an alcoholic mother, a father who's sleeping with other women, a brother who gets high in his room every day, and I don't eat unless I absolutely have to. And no one knows but me and my dolls. Well, except for the part about me not eating. Only I know that.

"I can't tell you." I say, then turn and walk away.

I push through the crowd, hearing both Neji and Gaara calling after me. I run up to my mother, tears sitting the corners of my eyes. She's now drinking a bright green wine cooler, while Ino is still drinking her purple one.

"Kyarra!" Mom says rather loudly, "How's my favorite daughter?" Her words are slurred slightly, and I can tell that she drank a lot more than just one and a half wine coolers.

"Mom, I feel really sick. Like I'm about to throw up. Can I walk home?"

"Are you sure?" She asks, but doesn't wait for me to respond, "Well, only if you take your phone and be safe!"

"Okay. Bye auntie Ino, by mum!"

"Bye!" They call in unison, and I run back through the crowd, carefully avoiding the snack table.

I only live a few streets away from the Inuzuka's. It won't be a long walk home.

* * *

For the last ten minutes I've sat cross-legged in my attic, just staring at my dollhouse. Now, slowly, I reach forward and open it.

The Sakura and Sasuke dolls are laying together in bed. That never happens in my house. Mom always sleeps on the couch, and dad is always gone so late. When he does come back, he sleeps in the bed alone.

The Naruto doll is sleeping in his room. That happens often enough with the real Naruto. But this Naruto doesn't smell of cannabis.

The Kyarra doll is sitting on her bed, staring out the window. I remember putting her to bed, but I guess she couldn't sleep.

I pretend she's real sometimes. Maybe I just need someone I can talk to, someone who won't spill my secrets.

I pick her up and smile at her. I ask her how she is and she doesn't answer.

"I need to tell someone something, and I chose you." I tell her, "And you promise you won't tell anyone, right?" I make her head nod up and down. "Okay. I just... I need to get it off my chest. And I can't tell Neji or he'll freak out. I guess I could tell Gaara... but I feel that he wouldn't pay much attention. He'd probably just be thinking about cookies or something the whole time. Okay, I–"

"Kyarra?" I hear a voice call from behind me. I turn to see Naruto standing there. I hear Kankuro and Kin's voices float up the stairs. They must have left the party early so they could come here and get high.

"Sorry, Naru. I'll be quieter." I tell him, and he nods and walks away, closing the door behind him.

"To be continued." I tell my Kyarra doll, then tuck her into bed again.

I wonder what she was thinking about when she was looking out the window.

* * *

**ENDING NOTE!**

**I would really like you guys' feedback as to how you would like the story to turn out. I don't want to disappoint anyone, so PM me or review as to how you would like everything to play out/end. I won't be ending for a while though. But if you have some good idea's, I'll definitely be a happy muffin!**

**...I reeeeeally like muffins ^_^**

**Looooove ya!**

**~Kyarra-Chan (^_~)**


	6. Won't You Be a Good Sister?

**A/N**

**Wooooooooooooo I'm tired! But I decided I would update this story every day until it's done. Day six guys! Thank you for all the suggestions and I will definitely be writing a few in! (A few because some of them contradict each other.) Thank you guys so much for sticking with me for this long, I soooo love you guys!**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Won't You be a Good Sister?

I don't sleep all night. All I can think about is how much school is going to suck from now on. Every time I close my eyes, I see Elsie's grinning face, staring at me with her evil eyes.

I am not perfect. I am nowhere close. My family is not perfect. When people are around, we are merely puppets, string attached to every one of our limbs. We are more doll-like than the plastic family that lives in my attic.

We smile. We laugh. But every moment of it is fake.

I finally get out of bed at 6:00 am. The house is silent, everyone asleep. Mom and dad are sleeping in the same bed for once, but that's just because dad had to half-carry my drunken mother home. This might be the first time she hasn't passed out on the couch in months.

I walk down the stairs as quietly as I can. The steps groan under my weight. It is then that I decide I am not eating breakfast.

In the kitchen, I fill the kettle with water, then turn it on. It makes a bubbling noise that echo's through the house.

I take out a tea packet and a mug. Green tea boosts your metabolism. My stomach growls

loudly, and I find myself reaching for the fridge handle.

Just as I'm about to open it, I hear loud footsteps coming down the stairs. I turn to see Naruto plop down on the living room couch.

"Mornin' Ky." He waves slowly, "Making breakfast? Could'ya make me a sandwich? I'm wicked hungry."

Yep. I heard from a t.v. show that marijuana gives you a wicked case of the munchies. I'm pretty sure it was that exact wording too (1).

"Sure, Naru. The usual?" I make him sandwiches a lot. The usual is bacon, mayonnaise, and salt and pepper.

"You know it." He flashes me a grin, then turns on the t.v.

Me and my brother don't have a bad relationship. Of course, we're siblings, so we get in fights a lot. Normally they're over really stupid things too, like him breathing too loudly or me watching my dumb television shows.

After frying up the bacon and giving Naruto his sandwich, I sit down next to him on the couch with my green tea.

"Hey, where's your food?" He asks through a mouthful of bacon, looking at my mug.

"Already ate." I tell him, and he looks at me suspiciously, then swallows.

"I don't think I've actually seen you eat in months."

"We haven't had a family dinner in months. I eat in the attic or in my room."

He looks at me sadly, "Ky... Are you okay?"

I force out a quiet laugh, "What, you think I'm anorexic?" I pinch at my stomach, "How could THIS be anorexic?"

"You're too skinny, Ky. It doesn't look right on you." He puts a hand on my shoulder, and I shove it off.

"Well... Well at least I don't get high in my room everyday!" I say defensively, standing up, "I'm not anorexic, you're probably just hallucinating!"

"That lack of food is getting to your head!" Naruto also stands up, putting the other half of his sandwich on the table.

I push him backwards hard, "I do eat!"

"Oh yeah?!" He shouts, grabbing his half a sandwich and shoving it at me, "Go ahead! Eat it!" I take it from him, holding it in front of my face. One bite. Just one fat-filled bite is all I need to take to prove it to him.

I bite my lip and hand the sandwich back to him. "I won't tell mom and dad if you don't." I say, staring at the floor. He would never give up his weed for something like this and we both know it.

Naruto doesn't answer for a minute. Finally, he extends the hand that isn't holding the sandwich, "Deal."

I shake his hand, and we both sit back down on the couch.

He hands me the sandwich, "But you do have to eat a little bit. And breakfast boosts your metabolism. Eat it." It warms my heart a little bit to know that he does care about me. At least someone realized what was going on with me, and now he's trying to help.

I protest anyways, "But-"

"Eat it!"

"Fine, fine!" I take the sandwich from him and rip a piece off. I take a bite. It tastes of fat, salt, and bacon grease.

I love it.

I devour it in a minute, and Naruto states at me.

"When's the last time you ate?" He asks, and I shrug as if it is no big deal, even though both of us know it is. I put my head on his shoulder and close my eyes. He continues to watch t.v.

I hear mom or dad begin descending the stairs. I open my eyes for a second to put my half-filled mug on the coffee table, then lean back against Naruto. After a minute, my eyelids are so heavy I can't open them. I have one last thought before I fall asleep.

I wonder if we are ever going to be normal.

* * *

**Ending note!**

**Sometimes I wonder if you read my stories just to see if they actually get better. WELL TOO BAD THEY DON'T!**

**I'm kidding, I actually think most of my stories get better as the chapters go on. Except for this one, chapter one was the best for this story. Who agrees with me? EVERYONE!**

**I'm really tired, don't judge me for my caps lockage!**

**Love you!**

**~Kyarra-Chan (^_~)**


	7. What Goes Down in the Kitchen

**A/N**

**I try not to write anything funny in my A/N's for this story because it's so angst-ish. Normally, I have caps lock turned on and I'm ranting, but I got yelled at for that before. Apparently I sounded psychotic and like a gifted eight-year-old.****Man, that review made my day. :D**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

What Goes Down in the Kitchen

I wake up on the couch, my head on a pillow and a blanket covering me. Naruto must have done that. I hear him walking around in his room, the t.v. turned up loud.

I look out the window and see that the sun is setting. I sit up and stretch, blanket falling to the floor. I shiver even though it's almost thirty degrees outside and mom doesn't like the air conditioning on. She says it costs too much money.

Back when I was fat it really bugged me, I was disgusting and sweaty all the time. Now I might have to start wearing pants in the summer.

But it's not good enough. I won't be good enough until I'm skinny. My stomach growls, but I ignore it. Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.

I stand up as I hear mom and dad come down the stairs. They step into the kitchen, having a quiet conversation.

Fist I hear mom, "...Family dinner... months... never around..." Louder words are mixed in with the whispers.

Then there's dad, "...Places I have to be... No time..."

"Well, make time!" Mom yells, "Your children never see you because you're away on your little trips every night!"

"I have to do things, Sakura!" Dad sounds exasperated.

"Don't act like I don't know!" Mom sounds like she's on the verge of tears, "Don't act like we all don't know what you're really doing all night!"

I pick up my mug, drink the rest of my tea, and walk into the kitchen. Both of them look at me, silent. I open the fridge and take out a small stick of celery.

They continue to stare at me. I wave the celery, "Dinner." I say, then take a bite.

They still do not speak.

"Stop fighting." I tell them, and my mom sighs.

"Kyarra, this is adult stuff, you need to stay out-"

"I'm not a dumb little kid!" I yell suddenly, shocking even myself, "So stop treating me like one! You're not the only one dad's affecting, mom!"

My dad walks out of the room and then out the front door. He slams it closed behind him.

"Do you see what you've done?!" Mom yells at me, "You should have just stayed out of it! You are a _child_, Kyarra! You don't understand what it's like..." She trails off, and I put my celery down and step forward.

"No mom, _you_ don't understand!" I scream, completely losing it. The puppet strings have been cut, I am finally cracking my doll mask. "My dad is never home, I rarely see him because he's always out sleeping with a bunch of women! My mother is a broken woman who drinks away her problems instead of paying attention to her children!"

"DON'T YOU TALK ABOUT YOUR PARENTS THAT WAY YOUNG LADY! YOU LIVE UNDER MY ROOF AND YOU WILL RESPECT ME!"

"AND THE ONLY ONE WHO EVER PAYS ATTENTION TO ME IS NARUTO AND YOU'RE SO OBLIVIOUS THAT YOU CAN'T SEE WHAT GOING ON RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE!"

I feel a sudden sharp sting on my cheek, and my head is whipped to the side hard. It hurts my neck. I stand still, frozen for a second.

"Mom!" I hear, then Naruto is at my side. I look up and see my mom with her hand up, a shocked look on her face.

She slapped me. She slapped me HARD.

"Kyarra, are you okay?" Naruto asks, and I don't respond. He shakes me, "Kyarra!" I nod slowly, then look up at my mother. She is crying.

"Kyarra, oh, Kyarra, I'm so sorry." She kneels down next to me and reaches toward me.

I step back quickly, pushing Naruto back too. "Don't touch me!"

"Kyarra, please!" She cries, and Naruto shakes his head at her. He takes my hand and leads me away, up the stairs, and into his bedroom. It still smells a little of weed from last night.

"Are you okay?" He sits me down on the bed and inspects my face. I see in the mirror across from me that there is a bright-red, hand-shaped mark on my left cheek.

"She hit me."

"I should have stepped in before. But I just watched. I'm sorry, Ky."

"It's okay. I'm going to go play with my dolls." I stand up and walk out of the room without another word. I hear my mother crying downstairs, but I block it out.

I don't tell my dolls what happened. I do not cry. I simply play as if today was the same as any other day. The Kyarra doll's friendly face makes me feel bad. Why does she get to be so happy and I don't?

Oh, right. This is my perfect family, so they don't have all the problems my regular family does. She deserves happiness, I shouldn't complain. But now I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't know how I will ever look at my mother the same way I did before she slapped me. I don't know when the stinging hand mark on my face will disappear.

I wonder if mom will notice I didn't eat the celery

* * *

**Ending note.**

**Uh... I completely forgot to write my other story because of this one... Meh, I have writers block anyways, I'll blame it on that. My fans will be disappointed though... (WHAT FANS?) SHUT UP MYSTERIOUS VOICE!**

**I need coffee.**

**Love youuuuuu!**

**~Kyarra-Chan (^_~)**


	8. I See Things That Nobody Else Sees

**A/N**

**Okay, hands up, who thinks I should write a Wintergirls fanfic? Seriously, I'm going to eventually, so sooner or later guys, what do ya think?**

**Enjoy This slightly-longer chapter!**

* * *

I See Things That Nobody Else Sees

Dad comes back home again a few hours later. It's about 10:00 and I can hear that my parents yelling in the kitchen again. I am in my bedroom, laying under the covers in my bed. Everyone thinks I'm asleep.

"You can't just walk away from this family, Sasuke!" Mom screeches.

"What, like you walked away from your children and replaced them with alcohol?!" Dad yells back.

"At least I'm not running around sleeping with other people!"

I hear loud stomping and then Naruto's voice, "Stop it both of you!"

"Stay out of it!" Mom yells at him.

"YOU ARE TEARING THIS FAMILY APART!" Naruto screams.

Just as mom and dad are about to tell Naruto off for stepping between them, I shove my earbuds in my ears and turn my music up as loud as it can go. I take my pillow out from under me and put it over my head, holding it over my ears. I can still hear muffled yelling, but it's better than hearing what they're saying clearly.

I do not cry. I don't even remember the last time I cried, it was so long ago.

I am simply numb.

I wake up late, around 11:30. Me and my father are the only one in the house. Naruto must be at Kankuro's or Kin's, and mom must be at Ino's, complaining about dad and drinking wine coolers. Ino doesn't know about my mom's relationship with alcohol, so she lets her have as many drinks as she wants when she's over.

Anyways, I wake up and go downstairs to see my father putting his shoes on. He's the manager of some company and has to work on weekends. He gets to sleep in though, so normally I see him before he goes off to work.

"Morning, Kyarra!" He chirps, smiling at me, "There's some oatmeal on the stove if you want it. Hell, eat it all! You're too thin!"

"...he's right, you know." I say quietly, not meeting his eyes.

"Who's right about what, sweetie?"

"Naruto's right." I look up and face him, sending him a glare that could cut someone, "You and mom are tearing this family apart." I walk into the kitchen and get a bowl for my oatmeal. Dad seems speechless.

Finally, after a few minutes of silence, he opens his mouth."What did I ever do to you?"

"Nothing." I tell him truthfully, taking my bowl and spoon over to the couch and plopping down on it, "It's what you didn't do. You're never around to tuck me in at night or talk to me or even sit in the same room as me and watch t.v... Or even say you love me."

"Kyarra, I..."

"Just go to work, dad. I've been fine on my own for months, one more day isn't going to change anything." I tell him without looking at him. I hear him pick up his briefcase and walk out the door.

I am alone once again.

I walk back into the kitchen and dump the untouched bowl of oatmeal in the compost bin. I stare at it. Part of me is glad I don't have to eat it. Another part hates that I don't get to.

I walk away, up to my bedroom, where I get changed into jeans and an AC/DC t-shirt. A big change from my usual dresses and bows, but what I want to do is change. So why not start with my clothes?

Besides, AC/DC is a great band.

I grab my IPod and take it up to the attic with me. My dolls are waiting patiently, all of them watching the television as a family. Doll-Kyarra sits in the floor, doll-Sakura braiding her hair. My real mom hasn't braided my hair since I was very young.

I pick up the Kyarra doll and make her wave. I wave back, then begin talking to her.

"I know, I'm not wearing a dress or a skirt. But real Naruto got me this shirt, and I thought I should wear something that reflects how I feel inside." I think that over, "I guess I feel lazy and rocker-ish."

She doesn't reply, just keeps grinning with that plastic smile of hers.

"Did you hear my mom and dad yelling?" I ask her, then make her nod.

"I didn't like it. Did you?"

She shakes her head.

"I didn't think you would. If this keeps up, they're gonna get a divorce. And I know people who's parents are divorced. They act all happy and always talk about how many more presents they get on Christmas than people with their parents still together. But I see how they really are. They're sad and lonely."

It is silent for a minute. I put the doll down for a second to turn some music on, quiet, so I can still talk to my dolls.

"I guess I'm sad and lonely already though. So it will still be the same, just more presents on Christmas." I crack a smile.

"I never got to tell you what I wanted to tell you before." I hear a creaking as the house settles.

"Well, here it is... I don't eat. Unless I really really have to. I wish I could eat, but I'm just so fat already and I don't want to gain any more weight. So one day I just... Stopped. It's been months now, and I only eat when I'm around people, and sometimes not even then. I guess I just can't stand living in my own skin. My body is my cage, and I just-"

"Kyarra?" I hear a voice call, and I whip around to see Neji standing at the door of the attic.

I wonder how I'm going to get out of this one.

* * *

**Ending note!**

**So... how should I handle this one guys? Should I make her pretend it never happened, or make her finally break down? I want you guys to help decide because I'm all about pleasing the fans! (WHAT FANS?!) SHUT UP!**

**Goodnight!**

**~Kyarra-Chan (^_~)**


	9. Uh-Oh, They're Coming to the Attic

**A/N**

**Thank you again to everyone who reviewed, you guys are so AWESOME! And thank you for all your ideas because, however much I would like to make this story out of my own head and have it turn into a giant mess, I would rather please you guys. Cause dat pleases me.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Uh-Oh, They're Coming to the Attic

Me and Neji are silent for a minute, just staring at each other. Finally, I reach forward and turn my music off.

"Hi, Neji." I wave, and he takes a step toward me.

"Ky, what did I just hear?" He asks, walking over and sitting next to me.

"I'm writing a story." I reply smoothly, picking up my Kyarra doll, "And I was just telling the plot to my dolls." I smooth down the dolls hair, and Neji takes it out of my hands and gently places her in front of the mom doll again.

"You aren't telling me something." He says seriously.

I look him dead in the eye, "I'm not telling you nothing."

"I'm serious Kyarra, there's something..._ wrong_ with you."

"Excuse me?!"

"You don't eat. You barely talk. You don't smile as often. You're just... Sad. And I want to know why, so you'd better tell me."

"I'm freaking _fine_, Neji!" I snap, "You're just hallucinating. I'm just the same as I always have been!"

"Not for the last few months, you haven't been! I've known you for YEARS, Kyarra! You've never been this down before and you're going to tell me why NOW!" He bangs his fist on the floor for emphasis.

"Or what?" I cross my arms stubbornly, and he reaches fast as lightning toward my dollhouse. I'm not fast enough to stop him from grabbing the Kyarra doll.

"Or the doll gets it." He threatens.

I keep the anger and fear out of my eyes. I don't want her to get hurt. It would be like hurting me. She is the perfect me, this isn't supposed to happen to her.

"Like I care what you do to her. She's just a stupid doll." I keep my arms crossed, but my gaze locked tightly on doll-Kyarra.

"You'd give your life for these dolls." He stands, doll in hand, and walks over to the attic door, locking in. Then he walks back and sits next to me again. He sighs and puts the doll back down again.

"Please tell me, Ky. You said something about your parents getting a divorce, and then about not eating..." He runs his hand through his hair, "I just want to help you."

I bite my lip and look around the room. It is so silent I can hear the birds outside. No one else is around, I can tell Neji, can't I? I know for sure he can keep a secret, but do I really _want_ to tell him? I can trust him though, right?

No. Yes. Maybe?

"Neji..." I feel a lump in my throat. It's just so HARD, finally telling someone everything that has gone wrong. I don't want to, but at the same time, I need someone. Not my dolls, an actual person that can hold me and help me get through it.

My eyes are swimming with tears. It shocks me, I haven't cried for so long. I've just been numb, and now I'm crying because I have to talk to someone? I almost laugh.

Neji sees the tears and reaches toward me. I am suddenly reminded of my mother reaching for me after she slapped me. I instinctively move back fast, almost knocking over my dollhouse. It's silent for a second, then I blush lightly.

"Sorry." I sniffle, "Um... Something happened a while ago, and that kinda reminded me of it."

"Tell me, Kyarra. I just want to help."

So I do. I tell him everything. I tell him about dad and all of the girls he sleeps with, all of the times he could have been there for me but decided sex was worth more than I was. I tell him about mom and how she drinks away the pain of losing my dad instead of helping me with my homework or talking to me. I tell him how she slapped me and I can still feel the hand mark on my face even though it's completely gone. I tell him about Naruto and his weed addiction, about how my older brother is the only one who bothers to make sure I'm okay.

And I tell him about me. About how I haven't been eating, or sleeping right. I tell him all about how I hate myself, how I am a big disgusting fat whale and I am a huge, useless waste of space.

By the end, I'm sobbing hard into his shoulder. I take huge, gasping breaths as I hug him tightly, needing the support and never wanting him to let go. He hugs me back just as tight.

"I'm sorry, Kyarra." He says into my hair, "I had no idea it was this bad. God, I should have been here sooner. Why didn't you tell me?"

"I..." I think about that for a minute, "I don't really know. I guess I just... Was scared you would judge me or something."

"We're best friends. I wouldn't judge you."

"Should I tell Gaara?" I ask.

"...Let's wait a bit. It can be our little secret for a while."

I wonder if me and Neji could ever be something more.

* * *

**Ending note!**

**Whaddya think? Should I pair Kyarra with Neji? Should I make Elsie or that one girl I briefly mentioned named Kenzie go after Neji to try and make Kyarra's life even worse? AM I EVEN MAKING SENSE ANYMORE? IT'S LIKE A DAMN SPACESHIP UP IN HERE, I DON'T KNOW THESE CONTROLS!**

**Also, this story was supposed to be a one-shot... but I accidentally forgot to click the 'complete' boxy thing. Yeah, so I figured, 'hey, people like it. Why not, am I right?'**

**LOVE YOOUUUU!**

**~Kyarra-Chan**

**P.S. ...I really want Kyarra to be paired with Neji. I love him.**


	10. When You Walk Away

**A/N**

**GUYS I'M NOT DEAD! A LOT OF SHIT HAPPENED AND I KNOW I WAS GONE FOREVER AND JESUS AM I TIRED BUT I'M BACK! I MAY NOT POST EVERY DAY, BUT I AM BACK! I bet I lost all of my fans while I was gone (WHAT FANS?!) SHUT UP MYSTERIOUS VOICE!**

**Crazy Kyarra strikes again!**

***cries* I'm so sooooorrry! ;-; please don't hate me! I STILL LOVE YOU!**

**ON WITH THE STORY!**

* * *

When You Walk Away

I am awake, but I don't open my eyes. Why? Because it's Monday. I don't want to go back to school. I don't want to have to face Elsie and Kenzie and everyone else. I can't deal with any more on my plate right now.

Maybe if I sleep in, everyone will just think I went to school early with Gaara or Neji.

Just as I'm about to fall back asleep, there's a knock at my bedroom door.

"Kyarra, are you up?" Naruto's voice floats into my sleepy mind. I don't respond. It's only six though, he'll know I'm still here.

He opens the door, "C'mon Ky, it's Monday. School."

"Mmgph." I respond into my pillow. He comes over and rips the pillow out from under my head, my face falling into the mattress.

"I don't wanna!" I groan quietly, knowing I have already lost this fight.

"Well, if I gotta, you gotta." He says, then hits me with the pillow and walks out of the room with a smile on his face.

I am not smiling.

* * *

School went by slower than ever, as if the clocks had stopped working right. Between classes, the halls were filled with people who shoved me into lockers and pulled my hair, girls who called me ugly names like "slut" and "whore" and "whale".

Neji tried to get them to stop, and I told him I didn't need his protection. It didn't make him stop though.

"I will protect you, nothing will hurt you with me around!" He yelled in the middle of our silent classroom. I almost smiled, but then my stomach growled loudly.

I did not eat breakfast. I did not each lunch. I did not eat dinner last night.  
I feel very tired.  
I feel very hungry.  
I feel very dizzy.

* * *

The bell to go home just rings, and me, Neji, and Gaara are walking though the crowded hallways. Some guy I don't know leans forward and slaps my sketchbook out of my hand. Gaara turns to him.

"Do you have a death wish?" He asks without emotion. The guy, seeing the look in the red-head's eyes, backs down. Neji picks up my book and hands it back to me.

"We got your back, Ky." Neji tells me, our hands touching for a moment as he handed me the book. My heart skips a beat.

Okay... I like Neji. Ever since I told him, and he was so supportive and I just... I like him.  
A lot.

"Oh Ne-ji!" Came a singsong voice to our left. A hand reaches through the crowd and grabs Neji's wrist, pulling him away from me and Gaara.

"Uh, I'll catch up later, I guess!" He calls before disappearing. Why do our halls have to be so crowded?

A girl stuck her foot out to trip me. Gaara stomps on it, and we keep walking.

When we finally reach the doors to go outside, we open them and are able to breathe again. Gaara asks me why everyone seems to hate me all of a sudden.

"I don't know." I respond, and it's the truth. Or, at least, I don't understand.

Maybe if they knew what went on at home they would be nicer. Maybe if they knew that I don't eat or sleep they would be nicer. Maybe if they knew that every name they call me hurts me in ways they couldn't even imagine, they would be nicer.

Or maybe not.

Me and Gaara continue to talk until we turn the corner. The first thing I see is the big maple tree me and Elsie and Kenzie used to climb back when we were "best friends".

Then I see the people standing under it.

Elsie.

And Neji.

Kissing.

Oh.

My heart aches in my chest. Why... Why would he... After all she's done to me... Why?!

Elsie pulls back from him, then turns to me, smirking triumphantly.

"Neji?" Gaara asks uncertainly, seemingly as confused as I am.

Neji seems to snap out of a trance and he turns to us. He opens his mouth to say something, but I turn away before he can.

"See you tomorrow, Kyarra!" Elsie says in the same sing-song voice as when she called Neji in the hallways earlier.

I walk away from them silently. I hear running footsteps behind me, and I expect to see Gaara slowing to walk next to me.

"Kyarra, please, I can explain!" It's Neji.

I say nothing.

"Elsie, she... She kissed me! I was confused, so I didn't pull away and-"

"I HATE YOU!" I explode, turning to him, "YOU'RE A LIAR! YOU SAID YOU WOULD PROTECT ME, YOU WOULDN'T LET ANYTHING HURT ME!"

"Kyarra, please-"

"DON'T EVER TALK TO ME AGAIN!" Tears burn behind my eyelids, but I push them back. I will never cry in front of him again. Never.

I run away from him. I run as far away as I can, then farther. My legs ache and my lungs burn. Somehow, I find myself standing in front of my house. My feet had carried me here without me knowing.

I wonder how much farther I could have run.

* * *

**ENDING NOTE!**

**I AM SO SORRY FOR BEING GONE FOR SO LONG! I WILL NEVER STOP APOLOGIZING!**

**Okay, I'm done.**

**PEACE!**

**~Kyarra-Chan (^_~)**


	11. One Day They'll See

**A/N**

**Bleh, I hate being sick! But it gave me time to write so that's one plus! I'M RUNNING OUT OF LYRICS FOR THE CHAPTER TITLES! I'm also watching Pacific Rim and someone is getting eaten as I speak... I mean type... Ever read Ender's Game? If you have, then you'll know what I mean when I say THAT'S ALMOST AS BAD AS DYING BY GETTING KICKED IN THE CROTCH!**

**Every single one of you, go read Ender's Game.**

**Also, I just ruined this chapter with my A/N.**

**Yojne!**

* * *

One Day They'll See

I walk through the front door of my house and step into the living room. The t.v. is on, and my mom is asleep on the couch, probably passed out from how much alcohol she consumed today, same as always. No matter how hard I try to forget, I can still feel the mark from the slap she gave me. You can't see it on the outside, it has long since faded away. But I can feel it inside my heart.

I lost my mom.

I walk upstairs, past my parents empty bedroom. My dad is probably out somewhere, doing things he shouldn't with another woman when he could be here, trying to pick up the pieces of my mothers heart. Or maybe mine. He was never here for any of us when we needed it. I don't even remember the last time he asked me how I was. I wonder what I would have answered if he had.

I lost my dad.

I walk past my brothers room. He says he is here for me, but he is not. I realize that now. If he was here, he would have tried to save me from everything that has happened. He's probably out smoking with Kankuro and Kin, instead of leaving me alone with my broken mother in a house full of bad memories. He doesn't even try to make me eat anymore, he just assumes I have been.

I lost my brother.

I walk into my room, then up to my bedside table. I look at the small picture frame next to my alarm clock. In the picture, Neji and Gaara are standing next to each other and I'm behind them, hugging them. Neji is probably with Elsie, doing things it hurts to think about, and Gaara is probably at home, not caring. Why did I think they ever cared?

I lost my friends.

I pick up the picture frame and throw it against the wall as hard as I can, watching as the wood cracks and the glass shatters. I pause a moment to make sure mom hasn't woken up from the noise. Then I bend down and pick up the picture, glass shards getting caught on my hand. I see little beads of blood slowly appearing where I got cut, but I don't care. I look at the picture, at our happy, smiling doll faces.

Without emotion, I rip it in half, crumple the pieces up, and throw it in the garbage.

I realize now, what alone is. Alone is being in a room full of people, knowing none of them truly care about you. Alone is having someone next to you, and while they are in your heart, you're not in theirs. Alone is looking around and knowing that things are only going to get worse, and no one is trying to stop it. They simply walk in to your life and walk out, leaving you as if you are nothing to them.

Alone hurts.

I calmly leave my room and climb the stairs to the attic. I slowly walk to my dollhouse, as if my legs are made of lead. I don't want to walk anymore. Maybe I can stop walking the same way I stopped eating. I can simply sit here with my dolls and refuse to leave. They can drag me out, but I swear I will leave kicking and screaming.

I'm going crazy.

I am crazy.

I lean down and look inside the small house. The sister doll is sitting on her bed, alone in her bedroom while everyone else is in different rooms. Naruto doll is looking under his mattress for something. Sakura doll is near the liquor cabinet. Sasuke doll is in the front hall, about to walk out the door. Kyarra dolls face is in her hands, as if she is crying. I pull them away.

She looks sad.  
She looks lonely.  
She looks too skinny.  
She looks like me.

Crazy Kyarra sits on the floor,  
What is she supposed to feel?  
She is playing with her dolls,  
Pretending that they are real.

I almost laugh at my little poem. Crazy Kyarra, that's what they will call me. I'm getting crazier by the second. I am all alone, what do I have left to hold on to?

Alone.

Alone.

Alone.

The word echos through my head, it bounces around and stabs at my heart.

I lost my life.

The room spins around me. I really must eat something before I black out. I'm not used to running so far while eating so little. Maybe one day people will see what is happening to me.

I stand and walk downstairs to the kitchen, where I eat a piece of lettuce and drink a tall glass of water. My mother is still sleeping. I'm beginning to wonder what can wake her up from her alcohol-induced sleep. Maybe sleeping is better for her anyways. Now I know that the real nightmares happen when you are awake.

I wonder if I will ever be whole again.

* * *

**Ending note!**

**Haha... I'm depressing, aren't I ^_^ But you love me anyways! (...) WHAT NOW? (Oh Kyarra, if only there was someone out there who loved you.) SHUT UP YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO QUOTE FROZEN! OBSESSING OVER DISNEY MOVIES IS MY THING! (I thought obsession over Naruto was your thing.) SHUT UP! I AM A MULIT-FANDOM MEMBER!**

**HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY!**

**~Kyarra-Chan (^.~)**


	12. Mom, Please Wake Up!

**A/N**

**HEY HAY PARTAY PEOPLE! Hahaha... I am laughing manically... and you'll see why... damn, I am a bad person! WHO AM I, VERONICA ROTH?! (STOP OBSESSING OVER WILL, KYARRA, HE IS DEAD!) NO HE'S NOT! I'LL NEVER FORGIVE YOU TRIS! (SHUT UP!)**

**Haha, I talk to myself a lot ^.^' Sorry. I AM EIGHT KINDS OF CRAZY AND AMAZING! WHOEVER LEFT THAT REVIEW, THAT MADE MY ENTIRE MONTH, SERIOUSLY! I started crying and I was like, "Somebody finally gets me ;-;" Hohmigosh I'm tired and Queen Elsa was out my house earlier for my sister's birthday.**

**LITTLE. KIDS. EVERYWHERE!**

**ENJOY!**

* * *

Mom, Please Wake Up!

Dad hasn't come back home yet. It's five a.m. and he's not home. Normally he's back much earlier, so this is weird for me. I wonder where he is, but then shake my head as I realize it's probably best I don't know.

Naruto isn't home either. He called to let me and mom (who was still asleep when he called) know that he was staying over at the Sabaku's house.

It's just me and my mother.

I have school today, so I get out of bed at 5:30 and pick out my clothes for today: a red dress and a red ribbon for my hair. I wish I could wear my AC/DC shirt, but then the kids at school would probably turn it into something bad to say about me.

I take a quick shower, then get dressed. Before leaving my room I stare at the broken glass next to my bedside table. I remember how it got there, then walk over to it and just look at it.

The frame is where I left it. The picture is still crumpled in the garbage. My heart aches in pain when I remember why I did that. I try to stop thinking about it, but I can't. I look in my mirror, then make my expression blank.

Then, calmly, I lean down and put my hand down hard onto the glass. I wince, but then I feel better somehow. I just... Forget about everything for a second. It's just me, no one else. I'm alone... But it's a good alone.

And then it's over.

I stand up and brush the now-slightly-red glass from my palm back onto the floor. I'll clean it up later.

I head downstairs and into the kitchen. Mom is still laying on the couch, in the same position as she was yesterday, but I don't check if she's awake or asleep.

I make a lot of noise in the kitchen so if mom is awake she'll think I'm making something for breakfast, and if she's asleep she'll wake up and talk to me for once. She hasn't spoken to me since she slapped me. I think she's scared that I'm afraid of her now. Maybe I am just a little bit afraid, but I'm mostly angry. But still, I love her wether she hit me or not.

It's just that not all wounds heal.

I rinse my hand under cool water and wince when it stings. I wonder if doing that was the best idea. The bleeding has almost stopped, so I'm sure I'll be fine.

I open a cupboard reach for the first low-calorie thing I see: saltine crackers. As I reach, I accidentally knock down a plastic container filled with cereal. It makes a loud crashing sound as it hits the floor.

Well, mom will definitely be awake now.

She doesn't say anything to me. Just continues to lay there, ignoring me. I wonder if she know that dad and Naruto aren't home. I wonder if she thinks I might be one of them.

I wonder if she's going to avoid all of us.

I eat a few crackers, then pick the container up off the floor and put it back in the cupboard. I put the saltine crackers on the counter, and take out the peanut butter. I dip a knife in the jar and then partially rinse it off. I place it on the counter next to the crackers and admire my masterpiece.

There. Now mom'll think I ate peanut butter and crackers for breakfast.

She still hasn't moved though. I should be the braver person and say good morning to her.

I walk over to the other side of the couch to see that her eyes are still closed. That's weird, she should be wide awake with the amount of noise I made. Maybe she's pretending to be asleep so she doesn't have to face me.

"Mom." I say quietly, staring at her closed eyes.

She doesn't respond. She doesn't move. It barely looks like she's breathing, but I see her chest rise and fall lightly.

"Mom?" I shake her shoulder a little bit. She still isn't moving. Why isn't she moving?!

"Mom?!" I shake both of her shoulders harder, "This isn't funny anymore, mom! Just wake up!"

She won't wake up. What do I do?! Oh god, what is happening?!

I start hyperventilating, clutching her hand hard as if she would wake up from the pain.

"Mom, please wake up!" Tears start streaming down my face, "Mom!" I lean down and put my head on her chest, listening to her heartbeat, "Wake up!" I sob, hugging her tight. How long has she been asleep for?! Since yesterday at least! God, Kyarra, do something, do anything!

I dart to my feet and run to the nearest telephone.

I dial 911.

I wonder what I'll say when they answer.

* * *

**ENDING NOTE!**

**OOOHHHHHHHH DAMN BET YOU DIDNT SEE THAT COMING! I WAS HINTING AT IT ALL CHAPTER AND THEN I WAS ALL LIKE, "NOW IS THE MOMENT OF TRUTH!" AND THEN I TYPED "She still isn't moving"**

**Have a wonderful day my friends!**

**~Kyarra-Chan (^.~)**


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